When a blogger becomes a poet

I have thought about this,
And now I think it’s time,
Today I am going to write
An entire post in rhyme.

I’ll admit, it’s just to distract you
From my inactivity,
And the fact that I haven’t written a post
Since all eternity.

You see, I’ve been quite busy,
I’ve had lots of homework to do;
Tests to take, priceless items to break,
Multinational corporations to sue.

And yes, I’ve been travelling,
The packing took a while.
Let’s just say, it ended with
A body bag in a rubbish pile.

And on my travels, I chanced upon
Mr. President – Barack Obama,
From behind the curtain of snipers and rifles
He appeared to be quite the charmer.

Then of course, I had my homework,
Tons of it! (I’m not lying)
This took up most of my time.
It involved a lot of crying.

I also tried to start a diary,
Just in case I’m ever famous someday,
But I only managed one entry:
“Nothing much happened today.”

In a fit of misplaced enthusiasm,
I did some landscape painting,
And when nobody understood it,
I called it “a modern art thing”.

I suppose I should apologise now
For not writing in so long,
And then trying to make up for it with
A poor excuse for a song.

And now I think I’m running out of rhymes,
I just called a poem ‘a song’
I’ll end before this gets any worse,
Goodbye, readers! So long!

(Applause)